Unbecoming

Three generations of women navigate their complicated relationships while caring for Mary, the family matriarch who has dementia. Katie, a seventeen-year-old struggling with her sexuality and identity, finds herself drawn to helping her estranged grandmother despite her mother Caroline's resistance. Caroline battles to balance single parenthood, work pressures, and the sudden reappearance of her mother Mary in her life. Mary's deteriorating condition forces the family to confront long-buried secrets and resentments that have shaped their lives. As the present storyline progresses alongside Mary's resurfacing memories, the novel explores how the past influences current relationships and choices. The narrative examines themes of identity, forgiveness, and the complex bonds between mothers and daughters across generations.

Readers appreciate the complex relationships between three generations of women and the authentic portrayal of a teenager caring for a grandmother with dementia. Many note the book handles difficult subjects like sexuality, divorce, and family secrets with sensitivity. Positive reviews highlight the character development, especially Katie's growth and Mary's vivid memories. Readers connect with the realistic family dynamics and the way secrets unravel. Critics find the pacing slow, particularly in the first third. Some readers mention the plot becomes predictable and that Katie's romance subplot feels less compelling than the family story. Ratings: Goodreads: 4.0/5 (8,400+ ratings) Amazon: 4.4/5 (180+ ratings) Barnes & Noble: 4.3/5 (30+ ratings) "The three women's voices are distinct and real" - Goodreads reviewer "Takes time to get going but worth sticking with" - Amazon reviewer "Portrayal of dementia is spot-on" - Goodreads reviewer

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🔖 Author Jenny Downham was an actress before becoming a writer, performing in various community theater productions that focused on social issues. 📚 The book explores three generations of women dealing with memory loss, family secrets, and sexuality, drawing parallels between coming out stories and dementia patients "coming out" of their memories. ⭐ "Unbecoming" won the Stonewall Honor Book award in 2017 for its authentic portrayal of LGBTQ+ themes. 🌟 The title "Unbecoming" works as a clever play on words - referring both to "unladylike" behavior and the process of losing one's former self through dementia. 📖 Downham spent three years researching dementia and interviewing families affected by the condition to ensure an accurate portrayal in the novel.