This Is How It Always Is

A family's world shifts when their youngest child begins showing signs of gender nonconformity at a young age. Parents Penn and Rosie, along with their four older sons, must navigate uncharted territory as they support their child while keeping secrets from their community. The story moves between their small Midwest town and the Pacific Northwest as the family seeks a fresh start and new perspectives. Their experiences highlight the daily realities, challenges and unexpected moments of joy that come with raising a transgender child in contemporary America. Within this narrative lies an exploration of identity, truth-telling, and the lengths parents will go to protect their children. The novel examines how families evolve, adapt and redefine themselves when faced with circumstances that defy conventional wisdom and societal expectations. The novel raises questions about the stories we tell others versus the ones we tell ourselves, and what it means to live authentically in a world that often demands conformity.

Readers praise the book's empathetic portrayal of a transgender child and their family's journey. Parents specifically connect with the realistic depiction of family dynamics and difficult parenting decisions. Many note the book helped them better understand transgender experiences. Liked: - Natural, conversational writing style - Complex character development - Balance of humor and serious topics - Educational without being preachy Disliked: - Slow middle section in Thailand - Some found the ending rushed - A few readers felt the parents' choices were questionable - Occasional meandering storylines "The family felt real - messy and loving and trying their best," noted one Amazon reviewer. Another on Goodreads said "The Thailand portion lost me completely." Ratings: Goodreads: 4.33/5 (146,000+ ratings) Amazon: 4.6/5 (5,800+ ratings) BookBrowse: 4.5/5 Barnes & Noble: 4.4/5 (670+ ratings)

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Little Fires Everywhere by Celeste Ng Multiple families intersect in a story about parenthood, identity, and the price of keeping secrets to protect those we love.

The Tea Girl of Hummingbird Lane by Lisa See A mother makes difficult choices for her daughter's future, leading to questions about identity, cultural belonging, and what parents owe their children.

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★ Author Laurie Frankel drew inspiration from her own experience as the mother of a transgender child, though she emphasizes the novel itself is fiction. ✦ The book's title comes from a recurring theme that parenting always involves making decisions without knowing the outcome—"this is how it always is." ★ The novel sparked significant discussion in book clubs nationwide and was selected as Reese Witherspoon's Book Club pick in 2017. ✦ The story's setting shifts between Wisconsin and Seattle, mirroring Frankel's own life journey from the Midwest to the Pacific Northwest. ★ Traditional Buddhist tales are woven throughout the narrative, serving as metaphors for the family's journey and connecting to the mother's career as a storyteller.