IL n’en est pas à douzaines, comme chacun sçait; et notamment aux deuoirs de mariage: car c’est vn marché plein de tant d’espineuses circonstances, qu’il est malaisé que la volonté d’vne femme, s’y maintienne entiere long temps. Les hommes, quoy qu’ils y soyent auec vn peu meilleure condition, y ont trop affaire. La touche d’vn bon mariage, et sa vraye preuue, regarde le temps que la societé dure; si elle a esté constamment douce, loyalle, et commode. En nostre siecle, elles reseruent plus communément, à estaller leurs bons offices, et la vehemence de leur affection, enuers leurs maris perdus: cherchent au moins lors, à donner tesmoignage de leur bonne volonté. Tardif tesmoignage, et hors de saison.
They do not come by the dozen, as everyone knows, and especially not in the duties of marriage. For it is a bargain full of so many thorny circumstances that it is hard for a woman’s will to stay whole in it for long. Men, though they are in a somewhat better position in it, have their hands full. The touchstone of a good marriage, and its true proof, concerns the time the partnership lasts: whether it has been constantly gentle, loyal and agreeable. In our age, women more commonly save the display of their good offices and the vehemence of their affection for their lost husbands; at least then they try to give evidence of their goodwill. Late evidence, and out of season.
Elles preuuent plustost par là, qu’elles ne les ayment que morts. La vie est pleine de combustion, le trespas d’amour, et de courtoisie. Comme les peres cachent l’affection enuers leurs enfans, elles volontiers de mesmes, cachent la leur enuers le mary, pour maintenir vn honneste respect. Ce mystere n’est pas de mon goust. Elles ont beau s’escheueler et s’esgratigner; ie m’en vois à l’oreille d’vne femme de chambre, et d’vn secretaire: comment estoient-ils, Comment ont-ils vescu ensemble? il me souuient tousiours de ce bon mot, iactantius mœrent, quæ minus dolent. Leur rechigner est odieux aux viuans, et vain aux morts. Nous dispenserons volontiers qu’on rie apres, pourueu qu’on nous rie pendant la vie.
Rather, they prove by this that they love them only dead. Life is full of strife; death, full of love and courtesy. As fathers hide their affection for their children, so wives willingly hide theirs for their husbands, to maintain a decorous respect. This mystery is not to my taste. They may tear their hair and scratch their faces all they like; I go and whisper in the ear of a chambermaid or a secretary: “How were they? How did they live together?” I always remember that good saying: Those who grieve least make the most show of it. Their sour faces are odious to the living and useless to the dead. We will gladly let them laugh afterward, provided they smile on us while we live.
Est-ce pas de quoy resusciter de despit: qui m’aura craché au nez pendant que i’estoy, me vienne frotter les pieds, quand ie ne suis plus? S’il y a quelque honneur à pleurer les maris, il n’appartient qu’à celles qui leur ont ry: celles qui ont pleuré en la vie, qu’elles rient en la mort, au dehors comme au dedans. Aussi, ne regardez pas à ces yeux moites, et à cette piteuse voix: regardez ce port, ce teinct, et l’embonpoinct de ces iouës, soubs ces grands voiles: c’est par là qu’elle parle François. Il en est peu, de qui la santé n’aille en amendant, qualité qui ne sçait pas mentir. Cette ceremonieuse contenance ne regarde pas tant derriere soy, que deuant; c’est acquest, plus que payement.
Isn’t it enough to make a man rise from the dead in vexation, that a woman who spat in my face while I lived should come and rub my feet when I am no more? If there is any honor in weeping for husbands, it belongs only to those who smiled on them: let those who wept during their life laugh at their death, outwardly as well as inwardly. So do not look at those moist eyes and that pitiful voice; look at that bearing, that complexion, and the plumpness of those cheeks under those great veils: that is where she speaks plain French. There are few whose health does not improve, and that is a quality that cannot lie. That ceremonious demeanor looks not so much behind as ahead; it is an investment rather than a repayment.
En mon enfance, vne honneste et tresbelle dame, qui vit encores, vefue d’vn Prince, auoit ie ne sçay quoy plus en sa parure, qu’il n’est permis par les loix de nostre vefuage: à ceux qui le luy reprochoient: C’est, disoit elle, que ie ne practique plus de nouuelles amitiez, et suis hors de volonté de me remarier.
In my childhood, a virtuous and very beautiful lady, who is still living, the widow of a prince, wore something more in her attire than the laws of our widowhood allow. To those who reproached her for it she said: “It is because I am no longer making new friendships, and have no wish to remarry.”
Pour ne disconuenir du tout à nostre vsage, i’ay icy choisi trois femmes, qui ont aussi employé l’effort de leur bonté, et affection, autour la mort de leurs maris. Ce sont pourtant exemples vn peu autres, et si pressans, qu’ils tirent hardiment la vie en consequence.
So as not to depart entirely from our custom, I have chosen here three women who also exerted all the force of their goodness and affection around the death of their husbands. Yet these are rather different examples, and so pressing that they boldly bring life itself into the bargain.
A humble wife
A woman of low station ties herself to her incurably sick husband and leaps with him into the sea.
Pline le ieune auoit pres d’vne sienne maison en Italie, vn voisin merueilleusement tourmenté de quelques vlceres, qui luy estoient suruenues és parties honteuses. Sa femme le voyant si longuement languir, le pria de permettre, qu’elle veist à loisir et de pres l’estat de son mal, et qu’elle luy diroit plus franchement qu’aucun autre ce qu’il auoit à en esperer. Apres auoir obtenu cela de luy, et l’auoir curieusement consideré, elle trouua qu’il estoit impossible, qu’il en peust guerir, et que tout ce qu’il auoit à attendre, c’estoit de trainer fort long temps vne vie douloureuse et languissante: si luy conseilla pour le plus seur et souuerain remede, de se tuer.
Pliny the Younger had, near one of his houses in Italy, a neighbor terribly tormented by some ulcers that had appeared on his private parts. His wife, seeing him languish so long, begged him to let her examine the state of his illness closely and at leisure, saying she would tell him more frankly than anyone else what he had to hope for. Having obtained this from him and examined him carefully, she found that it was impossible for him to recover, and that all he had to look forward to was dragging out a painful and languishing life for a very long time. So she advised him, as the surest and sovereign remedy, to kill himself.
Et le trouuant vn peu mol, à vne si rude entreprise: Ne pense point, luy dit-elle, mon amy, que les douleurs que ie te voy souffrir ne me touchent autant qu’à toy, et que pour m’en deliurer, ie ne me vueille seruir moy-mesme, de cette medecine que ie t’ordonne. Ie te veux accompagner à la guerison, comme i’ay faict à la maladie: oste cette crainte, et pense que nous n’aurons que plaisir en ce passage, qui nous doit deliurer de tels tourmens: nous nous en irons heureusement ensemble. Cela dit, et ayant rechauffé le courage de son mary, elle resolut qu’ils se precipiteroient en la mer, par vne fenestre de leur logis, qui y respondoit.
And finding him a little faint-hearted at so hard an undertaking, she said: “Do not think, my love, that the pains I see you suffer do not touch me as much as you, or that, to free myself from them, I do not mean to use the very medicine I prescribe for you. I want to go with you in the cure as I have in the illness. Put away this fear, and think that we shall have nothing but pleasure in this passage which is to free us from such torments: we shall go away happily together.” That said, and having rekindled her husband’s courage, she decided that they would throw themselves into the sea from a window of their house that overlooked it.
Et pour maintenir iusques à sa fin, cette loyale et vehemente affection, dequoy elle l’auoit embrassé pendant sa vie, elle voulut encore qu’il mourust entre ses bras; mais de peur qu’ils ne luy faillissent, et que les estraintes de ses enlassemens, ne vinssent à se relascher par la cheute et la crainte, elle se fit lier et attacher bien estroitement auec luy, par le faux du corps; et abandonna ainsi sa vie, pour le repos de celle de son mary. Celle-là estoit de bas lieu; et parmy telle condition de gens, il n’est pas si nouueau d’y voir quelque traict de rare bonté, Extrema per illos / Iustitia excedens terris vestigia fecit.
And to keep up to the end the loyal and vehement affection with which she had embraced him during his life, she wanted him also to die in her arms. But for fear that her arms might fail her, and that the grip of her embrace might loosen in the fall and the fright, she had herself tied and bound very tightly to him by the waist; and so she gave up her life for the repose of her husband’s. She was of low station; and among people of that condition it is not so unusual to see some act of rare goodness: Justice, as she left the earth, / left her last footprints among them.
Les autres deux sont nobles et riches, où les exemples de vertu se logent rarement.
The other two are noble and rich, a station where examples of virtue rarely lodge.
Arria
Arria follows her condemned husband, then stabs herself first and tells him, “Paetus, it does not hurt.”
Arria femme de Cecinna Pætus, personnage consulaire, fut mere d’vne autre Arria femme de Thrasea Pætus, celuy duquel la vertu fut tant renommée du temps de Neron; et par le moyen de ce gendre, mere-grand de Fannia; car la ressemblance des noms de ces hommes et femmes, et de leurs fortunes, en a fait mesconter plusieurs.
Arria, wife of Caecina Paetus, a man of consular rank, was the mother of another Arria, wife of Thrasea Paetus—the man whose virtue was so renowned in Nero’s time—and through this son-in-law she was the grandmother of Fannia. For the likeness of the names of these men and women, and of their fortunes, has led many people astray.
Cette premiere Arria, Cecinna Pætus, son mary, ayant esté prins prisonnier par les gens de l’Empereur Claudius, apres la deffaicte de Scribonianus, duquel il auoit suiuy le party: supplia ceux qui l’emmenoient prisonnier à Rome, de la receuoir dans leur nauire, où elle leur seroit de beaucoup moins de despence et d’incommodité, qu’vn nombre de personnes, qu’il leur faudroit, pour le seruice de son mary: et qu’elle seule fourniroit à sa chambre, à sa cuisine, et à tous autres offices. Ils l’en refuserent: et elle s’estant iettée dans vn batteau de pescheur, qu’elle loua sur le champ, le suyuit en cette sorte depuis la Sclauonie.
This first Arria’s husband, Caecina Paetus, was taken prisoner by the Emperor Claudius’s men after the defeat of Scribonianus, whose party he had followed. She begged those who were taking him prisoner to Rome to take her aboard their ship, where she would cost them much less expense and trouble than the number of people they would need to serve her husband; she alone would see to his room, his kitchen and every other duty. They refused her; and throwing herself into a fishing boat that she hired on the spot, she followed him in this way all the way from Dalmatia.
Comme ils furent à Rome, vn iour, en presence de l’Empereur, Iunia vefue de Scribonianus, s’estant accostée d’elle familierement, pour la societé de leurs fortunes, elle la repoussa rudement auec ces parolles: Moy, dit-elle, que ie parle à toy, ny que ie t’escoute, à toy, au giron de laquelle Scribonianus fut tué, et tu vis encores? Ces paroles, auec plusieurs autres signes, firent sentir à ses parents, qu’elle estoit pour se deffaire elle mesme, impatiente de supporter la fortune de son mary. Et Thrasea son gendre, la suppliant sur ce propos de ne se vouloir perdre, et luy disant ainsi: Quoy? si ie courois pareille fortune à celle de Cecinna, voudriez vous que ma femme vostre fille en fist de mesme? Comment donc?
When they were in Rome, one day, in the Emperor’s presence, Junia, Scribonianus’s widow, came up to her familiarly because of the fortunes they shared. Arria pushed her away roughly with these words: “I,” she said, “speak to you, or listen to you? You, in whose lap Scribonianus was killed, and you are still alive?” These words, along with many other signs, made her relatives realize that she meant to do away with herself, unable to bear her husband’s fate. And Thrasea, her son-in-law, begged her on this account not to throw her life away, saying to her: “What? If I ran the same risk as Caecina, would you want my wife, your daughter, to do the same?” “What then?
si ie le voudrois, respondit-elle: ouy, ouy, ie le voudrois, si elle auoit vescu aussi long temps, et d’aussi bon accord auec toy, que i’ay faict auec mon mary. Ces responces augmentoient le soing, qu’on auoit d’elle, et faisoient qu’on regardoit de plus pres à ses deportemens.
Would I want it?” she replied. “Yes, yes, I would want it, if she had lived as long and in as good harmony with you as I have with my husband.” These answers increased the care taken of her, and made them watch her conduct more closely.
Vn iour apres auoir dict à ceux qui la gardoient, Vous auez beau faire, vous me pouuez bien faire plus mal mourir, mais de me garder de mourir, vous ne sçauriez: s’eslançant furieusement d’vne chaire, où elle estoit assise, elle s’alla de toute sa force chocquer la teste contre la paroy voisine: duquel coup, estant cheute de son long esuanouye, et fort blessée apres qu’on l’eut à toute peine faite reuenir: Ie vous disois bien, dit-elle, que si vous me refusiez quelque façon aisée de me tuer, i’en choisirois quelque autre pour mal-aisée qu’elle fust.
One day, after saying to those who were guarding her, “It’s no use: you can make me die a worse death, but you cannot keep me from dying,” she sprang furiously from the chair where she was sitting and went and dashed her head with all her strength against the wall nearby. The blow laid her out full length in a faint, badly hurt; and after they had with great difficulty brought her round, she said: “I told you that if you refused me some easy way of killing myself, I would choose some other, however hard it might be.”
La fin d’vne si admirable vertu fut telle: Son mary Pætus, n’ayant pas le cœur assez ferme de soy-mesme, pour se donner la mort, à laquelle la cruauté de l’Empereur le rengeoit; vn iour entre autres, apres auoir premierement employé les discours et enhortements, propres au conseil, qu’elle luy donnoit à ce faire, elle print le poignart, que son mary portoit: et le tenant traict en sa main, pour la conclusion de son exhortation; Fais ainsi Pætus, luy dit-elle. Et en mesme instant, s’en estant donné vn coup mortel dans l’estomach, et puis l’arrachant de sa playe, elle le luy presenta, finissant quant et quant sa vie: auec cette noble, genereuse, et immortelle parole, Pæte non dolet.
The end of so admirable a virtue was this. Her husband Paetus did not have a heart firm enough of itself to give himself the death to which the Emperor’s cruelty was driving him. One day, after first using the reasonings and exhortations suited to the advice she was giving him to do it, she took the dagger her husband wore and, holding it drawn in her hand as the conclusion of her exhortation, she said to him: “Do this, Paetus.” And at the same instant, having struck herself a mortal blow in the breast and then pulled the dagger from the wound, she handed it to him, ending her life at that very moment, with these noble, generous and immortal words: Paetus, it does not hurt.
Elle n’eust loisir que de dire ces trois parolles d’vne si belle substance; Tien Pætus, il ne m’a point faict mal. Casta suo gladium cùm traderet Arria Pæto, / Quem de visceribus traxerat ipsa suis: / Si qua fides, vulnus quod feci, non dolet, inquit, / Sed quod tu facies, id mihi Pæte dolet. Il est bien plus vif en son naturel, et d’vn sens plus riche: car et la playe, et la mort de son mary, et les siennes, tant s’en faut qu’elles luy poisassent, qu’elle en auoit esté la conseillere et promotrice: mais ayant fait cette haulte et courageuse entreprinse pour la seule commodité de son mary, elle ne regarde qu’à luy, encore au dernier traict de sa vie, et à luy oster la crainte de la suiure en mourant.
She had time only to say those three words of such fine substance: “Here, Paetus, it did not hurt me.” When chaste Arria handed Paetus the sword / she herself had drawn from her own flesh, / “Believe me,” she said, “the wound I made does not hurt; / it is the one you will make, Paetus, that hurts me.” The saying is much more vivid in its natural form, and richer in meaning. For the wound and death of her husband, and her own, were so far from weighing on her that she had been their counselor and promoter. But having undertaken this lofty and courageous deed solely for her husband’s sake, she thinks only of him, even at the last moment of her life, and of taking away his fear of following her in death.
Pætus se frappa tout soudain, de ce mesme glaiue; honteux à mon aduis, d’auoir eu besoin d’vn si cher et pretieux enseignement.
Paetus immediately struck himself with that same blade—ashamed, in my opinion, to have needed so dear and precious a lesson.
Paulina and Seneca
Seneca’s young wife chooses to die with him when Nero orders his death, but is saved against her will.
Pompeia Paulina, ieune et tres-noble Dame Romaine, auoit espousé Seneque, en son extreme vieillesse. Neron, son beau disciple, enuoya ses satellites vers luy, pour luy denoncer l’ordonnance de sa mort, ce qui se faisoit en cette maniere.
Pompeia Paulina, a young and very noble Roman lady, had married Seneca in his extreme old age. Nero, his fine pupil, sent his henchmen to him to announce his sentence of death, which was done in this way.
Quand les Empereurs Romains de ce temps, auoyent condamné quelque homme de qualité, ils luy mandoyent par leurs officiers de choisir quelque mort à sa poste, et de la prendre dans tel, ou tel delay, qu’ils luy faisoyent prescrire selon la trempe de leur cholere, tantost plus pressé, tantost plus long, luy donnant terme pour disposer pendant ce temps là, de ses affaires, et quelque fois luy ostant le moyen de ce faire, par la briefueté du temps: et si le condamné estriuoit à leur ordonnance, ils menoyent des gens propres à l’executer, ou luy couppant les veines des bras, et des iambes, ou luy faisant aualler du poison par force.
When the Roman emperors of that time had condemned some man of rank, they sent their officers to tell him to choose whatever death he liked and to take it within such and such a period, which they had set for him according to the temper of their anger—sometimes shorter, sometimes longer—giving him time during that period to put his affairs in order, and sometimes taking away the means of doing so by the shortness of the time. And if the condemned man resisted their order, they brought men fit to carry it out, either cutting the veins of his arms and legs or forcing him to swallow poison.
Mais les personnes d’honneur, n’attendoyent pas cette necessité, et se seruoyent de leurs propres medecins et chirurgiens à cet effect. Seneque ouyt leur charge, d’vn visage paisible et asseuré, et apres, demanda du papier pour faire son testament: ce que luy ayant esté refusé par le Capitaine, il se tourne vers ses amis: Puis que ie ne puis, leur dit-il, vous laisser autre chose en recognoissance de ce que ie vous doy, ie vous laisse au moins ce que i’ay de plus beau, à sçauoir l’image de mes mœurs et de ma vie, laquelle ie vous prie conseruer en vostre memoire: affin qu’en ce faisant, vous acqueriez la gloire de sinceres et veritables amis.
But people of honor did not wait for this necessity, and used their own physicians and surgeons for the purpose. Seneca heard their message with a calm and steady face, and then asked for paper to make his will. When the captain refused him, he turned to his friends: “Since I cannot,” he said, “leave you anything else in acknowledgment of what I owe you, I leave you at least the finest thing I have, namely the image of my character and my life. I beg you to keep it in your memory, so that in doing so you may win the glory of sincere and true friends.”
Et quant et quant, appaisant tantost l’aigreur de la douleur, qu’il leur voyoit souffrir, par douces paroles, tantost roidissant sa voix, pour les tancer: Où sont, disoit-il, ces beaux preceptes de la philosophie? que sont deuenuës les prouisions, que par tant d’années nous auons faictes, contre les accidens de la fortune? la cruauté de Neron nous estoit elle incognue? que pouuions nous attendre de celuy, qui auoit tué sa mere et son frere, sinon qu’il fist encor mourir son gouuerneur, qui l’a nourry et esleué?
And at the same time, now soothing with gentle words the bitterness of the grief he saw them suffering, now hardening his voice to scold them, he said: “Where are those fine precepts of philosophy? What has become of the provisions we have laid in for so many years against the accidents of fortune? Was Nero’s cruelty unknown to us? What could we expect from a man who had killed his mother and his brother, but that he should also put to death his tutor, who brought him up and raised him?”
Apres auoir dit ces paroles en commun, il se destourne à sa femme, et l’embrassant estroittement, comme par la pesanteur de la douleur elle deffailloit de cœur et de forces; la pria de porter vn peu plus patiemment cet accident, pour l’amour de luy; et que l’heure estoit venue, où il auoit à montrer, non plus par discours et par disputes, mais par effect, le fruict qu’il auoit tiré de ses estudes: et que sans doubte il embrassoit la mort, non seulement sans douleur, mais auecques allegresse.
Having said these words to them all, he turned to his wife and held her tightly in his arms, as she was failing in heart and strength under the weight of her grief. He begged her to bear this misfortune a little more patiently, for love of him; he said that the hour had come when he must show, no longer by reasoning and debate but in deed, the fruit he had drawn from his studies, and that he was undoubtedly embracing death not only without pain but with gladness.
Parquoy m’amie, disoit-il, ne la deshonnore par tes larmes, affin qu’il ne semble que tu t’aimes plus que ma reputation: appaise ta douleur, et te console en la connoissance, que tu as eu de moy, et de mes actions, conduisant le reste de ta vie, par les honnestes occupations, ausquelles tu és addonnée.
“Therefore, my dear,” he said, “do not dishonor it with your tears, lest it seem that you love yourself more than my reputation. Calm your grief, and console yourself with the knowledge you have had of me and of my actions, spending the rest of your life in the honorable occupations to which you are devoted.”
A quoy Paulina ayant vn peu repris ses esprits, et reschauffé la magnanimité de son courage, par vne tres-noble affection: Non Seneca, respondit-elle, ie ne suis pas pour vous laisser sans ma compagnie en telle necessité: ie ne veux pas que vous pensiez, que les vertueux exemples de vostre vie, ne m’ayent encore appris à sçauoir bien mourir: et quand le pourroy-ie ny mieux, ny plus honnestement, ny plus à mon gré qu’auecques vous? ainsi faictes estat que ie m’en voy quant et vous.
Paulina, having recovered her spirits a little and rekindled the greatness of her courage through a most noble affection, replied: “No, Seneca, I am not one to leave you without my company in such a need. I do not want you to think that the virtuous examples of your life have not yet taught me how to die well; and when could I do it better, or more honorably, or more to my liking, than with you? So count on it: I am going with you.”
Lors Seneque prenant en bonne part vne si belle et glorieuse deliberation de sa femme; et pour se deliurer aussi de la crainte de la laisser apres sa mort, à la mercy et cruauté de ses ennemis: Ie t’auoy, Paulina, dit-il, conseillé ce qui seruoit à conduire plus heureusement ta vie: tu aymes donc mieux l’honneur de la mort: vrayement ie ne te l’enuieray point: la constance et la resolution, soyent pareilles à nostre commune fin, mais la beauté et la gloire soit plus grande de ta part.
Then Seneca took his wife’s fine and glorious resolution in good part; besides, it freed him from the fear of leaving her after his death at the mercy and cruelty of his enemies. “I had advised you, Paulina,” he said, “what would help you lead your life more happily; so you prefer the honor of death. Truly, I will not begrudge it you. Let our constancy and resolution be equal in our common end, but let the beauty and the glory be greater on your side.”
Cela fait, on leur couppa en mesme temps les veines des bras: mais par ce que celles de Seneque reserrées tant par la vieillesse, que par son abstinence, donnoyent au sang le cours trop long et trop lasche, il commanda qu’on luy couppast encore les veines des cuisses: et de peur que le tourment qu’il en souffroit, n’attendrist le cœur de sa femme, et pour se deliurer aussi soy-mesme de l’affliction, qu’il portoit de la veoir en si piteux estat: apres auoir tres-amoureusement pris congé d’elle, il la pria de permettre qu’on l’emportast en la chambre voisine, comme on feit.
That done, the veins of their arms were cut at the same time. But because Seneca’s veins, shrunk both by old age and by his abstemious diet, let the blood flow too slowly and too sluggishly, he ordered the veins of his thighs to be cut as well. And for fear that the torment he suffered might weaken his wife’s heart, and also to free himself from the distress he felt at seeing her in so pitiful a state, he took a most loving leave of her and begged her to let herself be carried into the next room, which was done.
Mais toutes ces incisions estans encore insuffisantes pour le faire mourir, il commanda à Statius Anneus son medecin, de luy donner vn breuuage de poison; qui n’eut guere non plus d’effect: car par la foiblesse et froideur des membres, elle ne peut arriuer iusques au cœur. Par ainsin on luy fit en outre apprester vn baing fort chauld: et lors sentant sa fin prochaine, autant qu’il eut d’halene, il continua des discours tres-excellens sur le subiect de l’estat où il se trouuoit, que ses secretaires recueillirent tant qu’ils peurent ouyr sa voix; et demeurerent ses parolles dernieres long temps depuis en credit et honneur, és mains des hommes: ce nous est vne bien fascheuse perte, qu’elles ne soyent venues iusques à nous.
But since all these incisions were still not enough to kill him, he ordered Statius Annaeus, his physician, to give him a draught of poison, which had hardly any more effect: because of the weakness and coldness of his limbs, it could not reach his heart. So they also had a very hot bath prepared for him. Then, feeling his end near, as long as he had breath he went on with most excellent discourses on the state in which he found himself, which his secretaries took down as long as they could hear his voice; and his last words long remained in credit and honor in men’s hands. It is a very grievous loss to us that they have not come down to us.
Comme il sentit les derniers traicts de la mort, prenant de l’eau du baing toute sanglante, il en arrousa sa teste, en disant; Ie vouë cette eau à Iuppiter le liberateur. Neron aduerty de tout cecy, craignant que la mort de Paulina, qui estoit des mieux apparentées dames Romaines, et enuers laquelle il n’auoit nulles particulieres inimitiez, luy vinst à reproche; renuoya en toute diligence luy faire r’atacher ses playes: ce que ses gens d’elle, firent sans son sçeu, estant desia demy morte, et sans aucun sentiment. Et ce que contre son dessein, elle vesquit depuis, ce fut tres-honnorablement, et comme il appartenoit à sa vertu, montrant par la couleur blesme de son visage, combien elle auoit escoulé de vie par ses blessures.
As he felt the last throes of death, he took some of the bathwater, all bloody, and sprinkled his head with it, saying: “I dedicate this water to Jupiter the Liberator.” Nero, informed of all this, feared that the death of Paulina, who was among the best-connected ladies of Rome and against whom he had no particular enmity, might bring reproach upon him; he sent back in all haste to have her wounds bound up again. Her own servants did this without her knowledge, for she was already half dead and without any feeling. And as for living on afterward, against her intention, she did so most honorably and as befitted her virtue, showing by the pallor of her face how much life had drained out of her through her wounds.
Voyla mes trois comtes tres-veritables, que ie trouue aussi plaisans et tragiques que ceux que nous forgeons à nostre poste, pour donner plaisir au commun: et m’estonne que ceux qui s’addonnent à cela, ne s’auisent de choisir plustost dix mille tres-belles histoires, qui se rencontrent dans les liures, où ils auroyent moins de peine, et apporteroient plus de plaisir et profit.
There are my three very true tales, which I find as pleasing and as tragic as those we invent at our pleasure to entertain the common people. And I am amazed that those who devote themselves to that work do not think of choosing instead from the ten thousand very fine stories to be found in books, where they would have less trouble and would bring more pleasure and profit.
Et qui en voudroit bastir vn corps entier et s’entretenant, il ne faudroit qu’il fournist du sien que la liaison, comme la soudure d’vn autre metal: et pourroit entasser par ce moyen force veritables euenemens de toutes sortes, les disposant et diuersifiant, selon que la beauté de l’ouurage le requerroit, à peu pres comme Ouide a cousu et r’apiecé sa Metamorphose, de ce grand nombre de fables diuerses.
And whoever wanted to build a whole, connected body out of them would need to supply of his own only the joining, like the solder of another metal. In this way he could pile up plenty of true events of all kinds, arranging and varying them as the beauty of the work required, much as Ovid stitched and patched together his Metamorphoses out of that great number of various fables.
Living for another’s sake
Seneca’s letter shows that prolonging one’s life for a loved one can itself be magnanimity.
En ce dernier couple, cela est encore digne d’estre consideré, que Paulina offre volontiers à quitter la vie pour l’amour de son mary, et que son mary auoit autre-fois quitté aussi la mort pour l’amour d’elle. Il n’y a pas pour nous grand contre-poix en cet eschange: mais selon son humeur Stoïque, ie croy qu’il pensoit auoir autant faict pour elle, d’alonger sa vie en sa faueur, comme s’il fust mort pour elle.
In this last couple, this too is worth considering: that Paulina willingly offers to give up life for love of her husband, and that her husband had once also given up death for love of her. To us there is no great counterweight in this exchange; but given his Stoic temperament, I believe he thought he had done as much for her in prolonging his life for her sake as if he had died for her.
En l’vne des lettres, qu’il escrit à Lucilius; apres qu’il luy a fait entendre, comme la fiebure l’ayant pris à Rome, il monta soudain en coche, pour s’en aller à vne sienne maison aux champs, contre l’opinion de sa femme, qui le vouloit arrester; et qu’il luy auoit respondu, que la fiebure qu’il auoit, ce n’estoit pas fiebure du corps, mais du lieu: il suit ainsin: Elle me laissa aller me recommandant fort ma santé.
In one of the letters he writes to Lucilius, he tells him how, having been taken with fever in Rome, he immediately got into a carriage to go to a country house of his, against the opinion of his wife, who wanted to keep him back; and how he had answered her that the fever he had was not a fever of the body but of the place. He goes on thus: She let me go, urging me strongly to look after my health.
Or moy, qui sçay que ie loge sa vie en la mienne, ie commence de pouruoir à moy, pour pouruoir à elle: le priuilege que ma vieillesse m’auoit donné, me rendant plus ferme et plus resolu à plusieurs choses, ie le pers, quand il me souuient qu’en ce vieillard, il y en a vne ieune à qui ie profite.
Now I, knowing that I lodge her life in mine, begin to take care of myself in order to take care of her. The privilege my old age had given me, making me firmer and more resolute about many things, I lose when I remember that in this old man there is a young woman whom I benefit.
Puis que ie ne la puis ranger à m’aymer plus courageusement, elle me renge à m’aymer moy mesme plus curieusement: car il faut prester quelque chose aux honnestes affections: et par fois, encore que les occasions nous pressent au contraire, il faut r’appeler la vie, voire auec que tourment: il faut arrester l’ame entre les dents, puis que la loy de viure aux gens de bien, ce n’est pas autant qu’il leur plaist, mais autant qu’ils doiuent.
Since I cannot bring her to love me more bravely, she brings me to love myself more carefully. For we must grant something to honorable affections; and sometimes, even though circumstances urge us the other way, we must call life back, even in torment; we must hold the soul between our teeth, since the law of living for good men is not as long as they please but as long as they ought.
Celuy qui n’estime pas tant sa femme ou vn sien amy, que d’en allonger sa vie, et qui s’opiniastre à mourir, il est trop delicat et trop mol: il faut que l’ame se commande cela, quand l’vtilité des nostres le requiert: il faut par fois nous prester à noz amis: et quand nous voudrions mourir pour nous, interrompre nostre dessein pour eux.
He who does not value his wife or a friend enough to prolong his life for them, and who obstinately insists on dying, is too fastidious and too soft. The soul must command itself to do this when the needs of those close to us require it. We must sometimes lend ourselves to our friends, and when we would like to die for our own sake, interrupt our plan for theirs.
C’est tesmoignage de grandeur de courage, de retourner en la vie pour la consideration d’autruy, comme plusieurs excellens personnages ont faict: et est vn traict de bonté singuliere, de conseruer la vieillesse, (de laquelle la commodité la plus grande, c’est la nonchalance de sa durée, et vn plus courageux et desdaigneux vsage de la vie,) si on sent que cet office soit doux, aggreable, et profitable à quelqu’vn bien affectionné. Et en reçoit on vne tres-plaisante recompense: car qu’est-il plus doux, que d’estre si cher à sa femme, qu’en sa consideration, on en deuienne plus cher à soy-mesme? Ainsi ma Paulina m’a chargé, non seulement sa crainte, mais encore la mienne.
It is a sign of greatness of heart to return to life out of regard for another, as many excellent men have done; and it is a mark of singular goodness to preserve one’s old age (whose greatest advantage is indifference to how long it lasts, and a bolder and more disdainful use of life) if one feels that this service is sweet, agreeable and useful to someone who loves us dearly. And one receives a very pleasant reward for it: for what is sweeter than to be so dear to one’s wife that, for her sake, one becomes dearer to oneself? So my Paulina has burdened me not only with her fear but also with my own.
Ce ne m’a pas esté assez de considerer, combien resolument ie pourrois mourir, mais i’ay aussi consideré, combien irresoluement elle le pourroit souffrir. Ie me suis contrainct a viure, et c’est quelquefois magnanimité que viure. Voyla ses mots excellens, comme est son vsage.
It was not enough for me to consider how resolutely I could die; I have also considered how irresolutely she could bear it. I have forced myself to live, and sometimes it is magnanimity to live. Those are his words, excellent as always.